I walked into a ballroom in full on drag and I must say I looked absolutely stunning. Perfectly coiffed wig, flawless makeup and a slinky seductive gown and fur wrap. The ballroom itself was full of people, all female.... at least at first glance. It was a mix of actual women, post op transgendered women and drag queens. One could not tell the difference for they all looked the same - big hair, full on drag makeup and lots of couture with lots of sequins and hair. My mother, my grandmother and two of my aunts were in the audience. Mariah and Alexis Rupaul's Drag Race were also in attendance.
It was to perform. Glowing with confidence, I walked on a makeshift runway. I walked, I posed, I used my "smeyes" I whipped the entire room into an uproar. There was a mix of both admiration and envy in the audience. I was what is known in the drag world as "FIERCE"
Afterwards, I was asked to walk on another runway next door, this time as a boy. I was to strip of my clothes and work the catwalk. It sounded easy enough so I agreed. This particular runway looked way more professional and in the audience were designers, photographers and models instead of drag queens.
I got onstage and suddenly my nerves caught hold of me and I had a slight panic attack. I slowly and nervously unbuttoned my shirt revealing naked torso. I began to twirl my shirt over my head and threw it in the air and fell right on my head. Embarrassed, i took off the the shirt and started to attempt to take off my pants which seemed like a herculenean labor. My jeans were very tight thus they were very hard to slip off. I couldn't manage to get them over my shoes and almost fell in the process. I tried to slip out of my ankle length boots and that made it easier to take the jeans off. Then much to my chagrin, I noticed the underwear I had on were not even remotely sexy - stretched out grey cotton boxer briefs. I sheepishly walked down the runway, feeling increasingly more embarrassed and unattractive. Then something possesed to attempt to do a somersault and slowly and painfully fall into a James Brown split. Needless to say the execution was beyond sloppy and not up to par.
