I walked into a ballroom in full on drag and I must say I looked absolutely stunning. Perfectly coiffed wig, flawless makeup and a slinky seductive gown and fur wrap. The ballroom itself was full of people, all female.... at least at first glance. It was a mix of actual women, post op transgendered women and drag queens. One could not tell the difference for they all looked the same - big hair, full on drag makeup and lots of couture with lots of sequins and hair. My mother, my grandmother and two of my aunts were in the audience. Mariah and Alexis Rupaul's Drag Race were also in attendance.
It was to perform. Glowing with confidence, I walked on a makeshift runway. I walked, I posed, I used my "smeyes" I whipped the entire room into an uproar. There was a mix of both admiration and envy in the audience. I was what is known in the drag world as "FIERCE"
Afterwards, I was asked to walk on another runway next door, this time as a boy. I was to strip of my clothes and work the catwalk. It sounded easy enough so I agreed. This particular runway looked way more professional and in the audience were designers, photographers and models instead of drag queens.
I got onstage and suddenly my nerves caught hold of me and I had a slight panic attack. I slowly and nervously unbuttoned my shirt revealing naked torso. I began to twirl my shirt over my head and threw it in the air and fell right on my head. Embarrassed, i took off the the shirt and started to attempt to take off my pants which seemed like a herculenean labor. My jeans were very tight thus they were very hard to slip off. I couldn't manage to get them over my shoes and almost fell in the process. I tried to slip out of my ankle length boots and that made it easier to take the jeans off. Then much to my chagrin, I noticed the underwear I had on were not even remotely sexy - stretched out grey cotton boxer briefs. I sheepishly walked down the runway, feeling increasingly more embarrassed and unattractive. Then something possesed to attempt to do a somersault and slowly and painfully fall into a James Brown split. Needless to say the execution was beyond sloppy and not up to par.
Entry 9: Journey to the East~ Orient Fantasy
I was at a seemingly Pan-Asian restaurant with Korean comedian Bobby Lee. We were both enjoying hot bowls of sumptous noodles and regaling each other with humorous anecdotes. As he ordered us two large bubble teas, I excused myself to the nearest facilities. Somehow I managed to get myself lost in the building. I found a door which lead to an immense dark room. A middle-aged Asian women yelled at me not to go in but never gave a reason why. Curiousity took the best of me and I walked.
As I walked further into the darkness, something in the center lit up. In the middle of the a soft white spotlight sat a young maiden in Chinese opera white and pink robe. Her face was made up in Chinese opera style - pale and white with flushes of pink around her eyes and cheeks. I looked at myself and I too was dressed in a Chinese opera and made up as a male Chinese opera singer. The girl seemed to be crying and I asked her why. As soon as she saw me, she stood up overjoyed. Apparently she was told to embark on a long journey but not before meeting a young man from another world to help her. There were demons that wanted to harm her along the way so she needed assistance and protection. Feeling quite chivalrous, I decided to go with her on her journey.
As we walked, those demons did appear and seemed to all want something from the girl, something person. One was a giant dressed as a Chinese general. He fed on people's dreams and grew more taller and stronger from them. The second was a woman, a Chinese siren who stole girls' voices so thought her own would remain sweet and melodious. The third was man dressed as a woman, in Japanese kabuki attire. He stole girl's essences and souls to remain soft and graceful. They sough out out this particular maiden as she was beyond pure and the things they sought from her would amplify their skills infinitely.
We managed to outthink and escape each demon. Finally far off in the distance was a bright light. Once we got to it, it got bigger. Without hesitation, we stepped into it. In an instance, we found ourself on a small stage in what looked like a big banquethall. He were surrounded by formally dressed Asians in groups at small round tables, all looking at us with a mix of surprise and annoyance. The demons were also there; the giant had a mike in his hand and was telling jokes in Chinese that apparently the crowd did not find funny. The other two demons were posing stylized. Once the giant saw us, he moved away for us to stand centerstage. Once we did, he audiences began applauding thunderously. As more people stood up to applaud, everyone onstage stood in a final stylized pose as confetti shaped like flower petals showered us.
Was this all an elaborate scene in a Chinese opera that I wasn't aware of? Was this part of the maiden's journey?
As I walked further into the darkness, something in the center lit up. In the middle of the a soft white spotlight sat a young maiden in Chinese opera white and pink robe. Her face was made up in Chinese opera style - pale and white with flushes of pink around her eyes and cheeks. I looked at myself and I too was dressed in a Chinese opera and made up as a male Chinese opera singer. The girl seemed to be crying and I asked her why. As soon as she saw me, she stood up overjoyed. Apparently she was told to embark on a long journey but not before meeting a young man from another world to help her. There were demons that wanted to harm her along the way so she needed assistance and protection. Feeling quite chivalrous, I decided to go with her on her journey.
As we walked, those demons did appear and seemed to all want something from the girl, something person. One was a giant dressed as a Chinese general. He fed on people's dreams and grew more taller and stronger from them. The second was a woman, a Chinese siren who stole girls' voices so thought her own would remain sweet and melodious. The third was man dressed as a woman, in Japanese kabuki attire. He stole girl's essences and souls to remain soft and graceful. They sough out out this particular maiden as she was beyond pure and the things they sought from her would amplify their skills infinitely.
We managed to outthink and escape each demon. Finally far off in the distance was a bright light. Once we got to it, it got bigger. Without hesitation, we stepped into it. In an instance, we found ourself on a small stage in what looked like a big banquethall. He were surrounded by formally dressed Asians in groups at small round tables, all looking at us with a mix of surprise and annoyance. The demons were also there; the giant had a mike in his hand and was telling jokes in Chinese that apparently the crowd did not find funny. The other two demons were posing stylized. Once the giant saw us, he moved away for us to stand centerstage. Once we did, he audiences began applauding thunderously. As more people stood up to applaud, everyone onstage stood in a final stylized pose as confetti shaped like flower petals showered us.
Was this all an elaborate scene in a Chinese opera that I wasn't aware of? Was this part of the maiden's journey?
Entry 8: Hypocricy in the Motherland ~ Gay Genocide
I was working as a missionary in a remote village in Central Africa. The tribe, whose name I don't recall, appeared to be a mix of the Maasai and the Woodaabe; both tribes are known for praising male beauty. The most noticeable thing upon seeing this particular tribe was that all the men were all strikingly handsome with tall lean bodies, flowing locks and dressed in very nice clothes both in Western and African styles. The tribe also had a very interesting tradition amongst the men; the men regularly slept with each other. Men would woo each other, sometimes forming couples and had sexual relations with each other, sometimes even with a family member. Women were deemed unimportant; their only purpose was to give birth and cook the meals that the men would hunt together. None of the women were allowed to be pretty; in fact all of the women seemed very comely, short of sunk over and dressed in very drab colors.
At some point I was in the central hut with the elders and all of the men in the village. For some odd reason were watching a documentary about the history of homosexuality in the world. All of the men sat strangly aghast; they seemed even appalled and disgusted, some with their mouths wide open. Considering their tradition, I really did not understand this reaction. At some point I walked over to my translater/guide; a very tall very good-lookng young man with beautiful smooth nut brown skin, striking features, piercing dark eyes, full lips and long ebony plaits. I asked him why everyone seemed so disturbed with the documentary. I was told they didn't like people being so free and open being gay. Being "gay" in the Western sense of the world was considered an abhorrence, something to be shamed and hated. "Gays" were effeminate sexual predators giving each other AIDS. In the tribe, men were allowed to have sex with each other as long as they were not in love and more importantly, acted "womanly"... like "gays" Naturally indignant, I announced I was gay. My guide gasped and leaped away as if I were a leper. The crowd of men looked back at us with surprised murmuring to each other and what was the commotion in the back. My guide covered my mouth and dragged me outside. I was told to stand and watch.
There were little boys, all between maybe 3-10, running around the village. Some were laughing as though playing a game while others cried and screamed, obviously frightened by something. Woman ran after a single child with angry hateful faces, fiercely swinging a sickle. One by one, each woman would catch and ultimate kill the child, impaling them upon the sickle's edge. Apparently, their was a tradition that women would ritually kill their own son if they acted like a girl, thus keeping the tribe masculine and pure.
At some point I was in the central hut with the elders and all of the men in the village. For some odd reason were watching a documentary about the history of homosexuality in the world. All of the men sat strangly aghast; they seemed even appalled and disgusted, some with their mouths wide open. Considering their tradition, I really did not understand this reaction. At some point I walked over to my translater/guide; a very tall very good-lookng young man with beautiful smooth nut brown skin, striking features, piercing dark eyes, full lips and long ebony plaits. I asked him why everyone seemed so disturbed with the documentary. I was told they didn't like people being so free and open being gay. Being "gay" in the Western sense of the world was considered an abhorrence, something to be shamed and hated. "Gays" were effeminate sexual predators giving each other AIDS. In the tribe, men were allowed to have sex with each other as long as they were not in love and more importantly, acted "womanly"... like "gays" Naturally indignant, I announced I was gay. My guide gasped and leaped away as if I were a leper. The crowd of men looked back at us with surprised murmuring to each other and what was the commotion in the back. My guide covered my mouth and dragged me outside. I was told to stand and watch.
There were little boys, all between maybe 3-10, running around the village. Some were laughing as though playing a game while others cried and screamed, obviously frightened by something. Woman ran after a single child with angry hateful faces, fiercely swinging a sickle. One by one, each woman would catch and ultimate kill the child, impaling them upon the sickle's edge. Apparently, their was a tradition that women would ritually kill their own son if they acted like a girl, thus keeping the tribe masculine and pure.
Entry 7: Human Evolution ~ New Orleans
In a dystopic future, the sea levels (as predicted) rose to astronomical heights and many cities found themselves sunk below the waves. As the Earth became used to being more oceanic, evolution took place among humans. The human race was split into two groups - those who remained on land and those dwelled beneath the sea. The latter obtained gills, film covered eyes and most important a fish-like tail; they became essentially mermaids and mermen.
New Orleans (affectionately known as "New Atlantis)as well most of Louisiana sank beneath the waves during a catastrophic super-hurricane. Over time the shorelines eroded and the marshy earth made it even more and susceptible to the overwhelming deluges and waves. New Orleans in particular had no hoping of making thru and i an instant, In sank beneath the waves. The descendants of the escapees all spread throughout the country and remained on land. But a few remained on the little land that was left and over time their descendants became used to living in a watery domain and eventually underwater. Eventually, all over the world these "merpeople" created colonies under the sea and major cities were rebuilt to a certain degree.
It seems that I was a merman living in "New Atlantis" and I was the only one of my kind in my family. All of my family were normal humans living on land but due to a strange strain of genetics, I was born a merman. I lived in "New Atlantis" but would regularly visit my family who would meet me at the shore. Unfortunately I could breath air for too long so our visits were always brief.
New Orleans (affectionately known as "New Atlantis)as well most of Louisiana sank beneath the waves during a catastrophic super-hurricane. Over time the shorelines eroded and the marshy earth made it even more and susceptible to the overwhelming deluges and waves. New Orleans in particular had no hoping of making thru and i an instant, In sank beneath the waves. The descendants of the escapees all spread throughout the country and remained on land. But a few remained on the little land that was left and over time their descendants became used to living in a watery domain and eventually underwater. Eventually, all over the world these "merpeople" created colonies under the sea and major cities were rebuilt to a certain degree.
It seems that I was a merman living in "New Atlantis" and I was the only one of my kind in my family. All of my family were normal humans living on land but due to a strange strain of genetics, I was born a merman. I lived in "New Atlantis" but would regularly visit my family who would meet me at the shore. Unfortunately I could breath air for too long so our visits were always brief.
Entry 6: Karaoke - A Siren's song to other Dimensions ~ Alternate Reality... TV shows
I was sitting in a smoky lavender bar at a table with two friends during karaoke time. As I don't particularly enjoy singing in public, I was content merely having a cocktail while silently judging to myself the calvacade of lousy singers. During the midst of all the cacophony, I was greeted by my best friend who just happened to be the host of karaoke night - a powerhouse of boisterous energy contained in a small round body; the reigning queen of the night ruling supreme over her adoring androphilic subjects. She looked at me with a knowing expressing, her tiny nut brown eyes twinkling and smirk etched upon her face. She slid a blank white ticket upon the table. At first I thought it was a karaoke song request slip; a passive aggressive suggestion for me to sing something. As soon as I touched the ticket,a dimensional wormhole swirling electric pink and purple formed around me and I dissapeared.
I found myself in a Japanese gameshow. Though dazed and confused, I recongnized and understood the language. The announcer asked if a recognized a song that was about to played over the speakers. A gorgeous Japanese lady in a magenta miniskirt came with with two containers. Apparently the contained soundtracks to one of my favorite anime series and was to be my prized if I guessed correctly. The song was also on one of the cds in the set. My excitement soon become anxiety because I could not think of the song title. After several seconds of drawing a blank, the buzzer sounded signaling that my time was up. I wondered if there would be a consolation prize or, as with most Japanese games shows, I would be given some sadistic punishment. Before I could find out, the wormhole appeared and I vanished.
Next I found myself in a very sketchy menacing looking neighborhood. There was an earpice in my ear and an unknown voice commanded me to run. I asked why and where to but I did not receive an answer. I kept running straight ahead making no turns so I wouldn't get lost. Then from behind I heard distant barking, yelling and gunshots. I looked behind and saw a crowd of stereotypical thugs who carried firearms and leashed pitbulls. They were in close pursuit so I ran as fast as my legs could carry me. Finally Imade it to an abandoned wrecked old car; in the backseat contained bags of money. "Was this my prize?" I thought. Before I could hear an answer, I disappeared again.
Next I appeared in a pristine all white painted and decorated upscale hair salon. To my right sat 3 people on platform behind a table - I assumed they were judges. One was a thick older effeminate black guy, the second was gorgeous Hispanic looking drag queen, and the third was a middle aged attractive white woman with blonde pixie cut hair. Seated in front of my was a lovely black girl with long small and tightly braided hair. The announcer (who looked like Rupaul as a man) gave me the challenge which was to create a new innovative style for her braided hair. I could tell that the young lady was apprehensive and the judges sat stoically while occassionally exchanging quick bitchy remarks amongst each other. I nervously take her braids out of a rubberband which kept them in a ponytail. I had a basic idea in my mind but I wondered if I would be good enough to impress everyone. I took the girl's hair in my hand......
I found myself in a Japanese gameshow. Though dazed and confused, I recongnized and understood the language. The announcer asked if a recognized a song that was about to played over the speakers. A gorgeous Japanese lady in a magenta miniskirt came with with two containers. Apparently the contained soundtracks to one of my favorite anime series and was to be my prized if I guessed correctly. The song was also on one of the cds in the set. My excitement soon become anxiety because I could not think of the song title. After several seconds of drawing a blank, the buzzer sounded signaling that my time was up. I wondered if there would be a consolation prize or, as with most Japanese games shows, I would be given some sadistic punishment. Before I could find out, the wormhole appeared and I vanished.
Next I found myself in a very sketchy menacing looking neighborhood. There was an earpice in my ear and an unknown voice commanded me to run. I asked why and where to but I did not receive an answer. I kept running straight ahead making no turns so I wouldn't get lost. Then from behind I heard distant barking, yelling and gunshots. I looked behind and saw a crowd of stereotypical thugs who carried firearms and leashed pitbulls. They were in close pursuit so I ran as fast as my legs could carry me. Finally Imade it to an abandoned wrecked old car; in the backseat contained bags of money. "Was this my prize?" I thought. Before I could hear an answer, I disappeared again.
Next I appeared in a pristine all white painted and decorated upscale hair salon. To my right sat 3 people on platform behind a table - I assumed they were judges. One was a thick older effeminate black guy, the second was gorgeous Hispanic looking drag queen, and the third was a middle aged attractive white woman with blonde pixie cut hair. Seated in front of my was a lovely black girl with long small and tightly braided hair. The announcer (who looked like Rupaul as a man) gave me the challenge which was to create a new innovative style for her braided hair. I could tell that the young lady was apprehensive and the judges sat stoically while occassionally exchanging quick bitchy remarks amongst each other. I nervously take her braids out of a rubberband which kept them in a ponytail. I had a basic idea in my mind but I wondered if I would be good enough to impress everyone. I took the girl's hair in my hand......
Entry 5: Driven to Madness ~ Beware of Pudding and Bearcubs
A very plain WASP-ish couple moved into a house that almost resembled my family's house. They seemed very content together but that would soon change. Over the course of the dream, the couple began to argue daily; the arguments were mainly started by the wife (Julia Sweeney from SNL)and ended with the husband (Jason Sudeikis from SNL)leaving. The wife started to grow distrustful of the husband, accusing him of adultery and other secret indiscretions which were not true. Eventually, the wife's grasp on sanity broke and she wanted the truth out bu whatever means necessary.
The husband come one sunny afternoon to see his spouse in the kitchen preparing chocolate pudding. She greeted him sweetly and calmly. Both alarmed but somewhat comforted by his wife's seeming serenity, he sat down at the table and began to sample from a bowlful of pudding already sitting in front of him. After one swallow, his body suddenly tensed. He began to sweat profusely. He opened the window to get some fresh air when he noticed little brown bear cubs in place of the usual neighbor stray cats staring up at him innocently while playfully waving their litle furry paws at him. In a panic, he rushed at his wife demanding answers. She greeted him with of a face of pure dementia. She let loose a crazed harangue of insults and accusations of his dishonesty, infedility and uselessness as a husband. All the husband could do was weep at the randomness of it all for there was nothing he could do remedy anything. The wife closed in him while he begged her to come to her sense. But to no avail.
I appeared in the house; apparently the couple was gone and I had just moved in. On the table was a big glass bowl of chocolate pudding. I looked out of the kitchen window and there were the little brown bear cubs standing on all fours staring back sweetly.
The husband come one sunny afternoon to see his spouse in the kitchen preparing chocolate pudding. She greeted him sweetly and calmly. Both alarmed but somewhat comforted by his wife's seeming serenity, he sat down at the table and began to sample from a bowlful of pudding already sitting in front of him. After one swallow, his body suddenly tensed. He began to sweat profusely. He opened the window to get some fresh air when he noticed little brown bear cubs in place of the usual neighbor stray cats staring up at him innocently while playfully waving their litle furry paws at him. In a panic, he rushed at his wife demanding answers. She greeted him with of a face of pure dementia. She let loose a crazed harangue of insults and accusations of his dishonesty, infedility and uselessness as a husband. All the husband could do was weep at the randomness of it all for there was nothing he could do remedy anything. The wife closed in him while he begged her to come to her sense. But to no avail.
I appeared in the house; apparently the couple was gone and I had just moved in. On the table was a big glass bowl of chocolate pudding. I looked out of the kitchen window and there were the little brown bear cubs standing on all fours staring back sweetly.
Entry 4: Life Upon the Wicked Stage
I was riding in a regular bus filled with theatre celebrities, both local and national. Apparently we were all headed to a very swanky benefit/award show for theatre. Not only was I selected to be an award presenter but I also had the pleasure of performing a duet with a celebrity - the incomparable and fabulous Eartha Kitt. Needless to say I was very nervous. I spent the time on the bus being very quiet; for one thing, I was intimidated by the talent that surrounded me but I was also reflecting on what laid in store for me. My contemplation was broken by the sound of giggling. It was coming from a gaggle of well-dressed sequined divas. They heard I was singing alongside Eartha and wondered if she would remember the lyrics (in reference to her old age). I assured them she would and made my way over to her. I asked her flat out if she was fine with the song and she replied with a smirk "But of course my dear. After all, I am a professional. Rrrrrrrr" She then linked arms with me and walked back to my seat. No sooner than we sat down, the background music to our duet came on over the PA - which by the way was a bossa nova version of "The Boy from Ipanema"... a very odd choice of song.
Suddenly the bus stopped downtown on the main street and we all got out. The event planner did a role call and gave all of the presenters their speeches. I though it was odd the bus stopped randomly on the street and not in front of where the event took place. Also, why did the planner give us our speeches then and not at the event? No one else questioned the randomness of it all. After everything was settled we all walked off.
The event was held in what appeared to be a ballroom in a hotel and it was filled with the creme de la creme of the theatre. Eartha and I had a table all to ourselves. For whatever reason, the Cosby family was there but they looked they way did back in the 80's. They performed a skit in which they were performing a skit but Denise couldn't remember a key line which halted everything and each family member was trying to help her remember it. It wasn't particularly very funny but people still laughed out of politeness because they were the Cosbys. Shortly after it was time for Eartha and I to perform. She sat seductively atop a grand piano and I stood beside her. The song was a hit!
Second dream
I was at home with the cast of some unknown play. All I know is that it was set in the 20's for we were in 20's garb - the girls wore various bobs and had on stringy sequined flapper dresses and the men wore sweater vests with dress shirts and slicks or pin-stripped suits. And for some reason various piano version songs from the musical "The Boyfriend" were playing in the background from an unknown source.
We were all preparing for I could only assume was a party of sorts. There was some really important person on his way so we were all really excited. Then some problems started developing and they were all due to the imcompetence of the assistant director - a young black guy who looked ike the guy who played one of Eddie Winslow's two friends on "Family Matters". His biggest plunder had to do with the food. He either told the caterer or cook not to come so it resulted in us trying to cook food at the last minute.
Meanwhile, as I ran around like a chicken with its head cut off, I bumped into my grandmother and aunt in the den. They were talking about throwing a party and what to cook. My aunt apparently had an entire pig already butchered but didn't know how to prepare it. I jokingly responded that they could cook it underground with hot stones Polynesian-style and they both that it was a wonderful idea (which is funny because in real life they would never agree to such a thing, especially my grandmother).
Then the doorbell rang and in walked a very tall very classically handsome man with wavy blonde hair wearing a tan trenchcoat, white scarf, dress shirt and pin-stripped pants. All of the girls and some of the boys stopped whatever they were doing and swooned over the guy. I didn't seem to interested. Apparently this guy heard about the show and wanted to be in it. He then stopped in his tracks when he saw a girl sitting by herself. She was kind of thin, not beautiful but not plain or ugly. And she was dressed in a simple flapper dress sans sequins and fringe. He went over to her and started talking. The whole interaction was like a melodramatic over-acted romance scene from an old movie - flowery words of love, eyes partly closed, over-acting, violins playing in the background. Then they kissed passionately. For no reason, the cast stopped whatever we were doing, ran to the living room, linked arms and percormed a slow kickline singing "I Could be Happy with You" a la big finale.
Suddenly the bus stopped downtown on the main street and we all got out. The event planner did a role call and gave all of the presenters their speeches. I though it was odd the bus stopped randomly on the street and not in front of where the event took place. Also, why did the planner give us our speeches then and not at the event? No one else questioned the randomness of it all. After everything was settled we all walked off.
The event was held in what appeared to be a ballroom in a hotel and it was filled with the creme de la creme of the theatre. Eartha and I had a table all to ourselves. For whatever reason, the Cosby family was there but they looked they way did back in the 80's. They performed a skit in which they were performing a skit but Denise couldn't remember a key line which halted everything and each family member was trying to help her remember it. It wasn't particularly very funny but people still laughed out of politeness because they were the Cosbys. Shortly after it was time for Eartha and I to perform. She sat seductively atop a grand piano and I stood beside her. The song was a hit!
Second dream
I was at home with the cast of some unknown play. All I know is that it was set in the 20's for we were in 20's garb - the girls wore various bobs and had on stringy sequined flapper dresses and the men wore sweater vests with dress shirts and slicks or pin-stripped suits. And for some reason various piano version songs from the musical "The Boyfriend" were playing in the background from an unknown source.
We were all preparing for I could only assume was a party of sorts. There was some really important person on his way so we were all really excited. Then some problems started developing and they were all due to the imcompetence of the assistant director - a young black guy who looked ike the guy who played one of Eddie Winslow's two friends on "Family Matters". His biggest plunder had to do with the food. He either told the caterer or cook not to come so it resulted in us trying to cook food at the last minute.
Meanwhile, as I ran around like a chicken with its head cut off, I bumped into my grandmother and aunt in the den. They were talking about throwing a party and what to cook. My aunt apparently had an entire pig already butchered but didn't know how to prepare it. I jokingly responded that they could cook it underground with hot stones Polynesian-style and they both that it was a wonderful idea (which is funny because in real life they would never agree to such a thing, especially my grandmother).
Then the doorbell rang and in walked a very tall very classically handsome man with wavy blonde hair wearing a tan trenchcoat, white scarf, dress shirt and pin-stripped pants. All of the girls and some of the boys stopped whatever they were doing and swooned over the guy. I didn't seem to interested. Apparently this guy heard about the show and wanted to be in it. He then stopped in his tracks when he saw a girl sitting by herself. She was kind of thin, not beautiful but not plain or ugly. And she was dressed in a simple flapper dress sans sequins and fringe. He went over to her and started talking. The whole interaction was like a melodramatic over-acted romance scene from an old movie - flowery words of love, eyes partly closed, over-acting, violins playing in the background. Then they kissed passionately. For no reason, the cast stopped whatever we were doing, ran to the living room, linked arms and percormed a slow kickline singing "I Could be Happy with You" a la big finale.
Entry 3: Pursuit of Justice... by any means unecessary
I was part of covert investigation team along with Betty White and the mom from "happy days". The investigation team was headed by the leader of "A-team", George Peppard/Hannibal. Our mission was to infiltrate an Asian family run bakery suspected of being an undercover drug smuggling syndicate. We arrived disguised baking goods delivery truck. After a bit of trepidation we were allowed inside. In the kitchen area were metal shelves white powder wrapped in clear plastic. At first glance they appeared to be mere flour however they were actually bags of cocaine and heroin. Unbeknowst to us, the leader of the syndicate, an old shrunken wizened lady, had been alerted that undercover spies was sent to infiltrate the organization and being foreigners in disguises we were immediately suspected. The old matriarch sent her myriad of sons after us with machetes and machine guns. Needless to say we tailed out of there as fast as could. After running about a labyrinth of metal shelves with bags exploding and white powder everywhere, we finally made it out. George Peppard/Hannibal, trade mark cigar in his mouth, was waiting for us in an army truck. No sooner after we drove off into the jungle, the whole building exploded.
In the next scene, Betty, George and I were bicycling in the city in nuns' costumes with white rubber masks on. We arrived at a building and entered thru a back door. Inside what looked like a dressing room, the "Happy Days" mom was waiting for us. She was wearing an orange and yellow vaudeville/Wild West saloon bargirl outfit. Betty and I got out of the nuns' costumes and into similar vaudeville/saloon girl costumes - I was in blue and green and Betty in fuschia and purple. As I was getting into makeup, I starting singing "Everything's Comin Up Roses" and for whatever reason I sounded like Seth Macfarlane. Eventually Betty, "Happy Days" Mom and George (dressed in a white tux and holding a puppet) joined in. After we finished singing, we ran onstange greeted by thunderous applause.
Apparently we were a vaudeville troupe of females (I was in drag disguised as a woman) with George being the only male and this was the cover for our spy group.
In the next scene, Betty, George and I were bicycling in the city in nuns' costumes with white rubber masks on. We arrived at a building and entered thru a back door. Inside what looked like a dressing room, the "Happy Days" mom was waiting for us. She was wearing an orange and yellow vaudeville/Wild West saloon bargirl outfit. Betty and I got out of the nuns' costumes and into similar vaudeville/saloon girl costumes - I was in blue and green and Betty in fuschia and purple. As I was getting into makeup, I starting singing "Everything's Comin Up Roses" and for whatever reason I sounded like Seth Macfarlane. Eventually Betty, "Happy Days" Mom and George (dressed in a white tux and holding a puppet) joined in. After we finished singing, we ran onstange greeted by thunderous applause.
Apparently we were a vaudeville troupe of females (I was in drag disguised as a woman) with George being the only male and this was the cover for our spy group.
Entry 2: In the Name of the Father - Catholic Illusion
I was roaming about the campus of my alma mater university. Out of curiousity I entered the chapel next door. Mass was about to start and I didn't want to be rude so I was about to leave. Then I noticed one of my little brother's sitting in a pew with luggage. As i walked to him, more people came in, all of Creole descent with varying skin complexions. There were lines like at a bank that people were hurrying to get into. Apparently the chapel was selling religious icons, momentos and indulgences which people were rushing to buy.
So I made my over to my brother. Apparently he got dragged to mass by a friend before they took their trip out of town. Before I could say anything, the organ started playing signaling the start of mass. As much as I did not want to stay, I didn't want to be rude and just leave abruptly so I sat down. I noticed that instead of a pastor, there was an old Creole lady at the altar. In a clear and resonating voice, she began making a long speech about how to be "good Catholic". I had long since been disillusioned by Catholicism and cut my ties with the church so needless to say I was very uncomfortable and really wanted to leave. However as this speech continued, my clothes started disappearing until I had nothing on but my underwear. Despite how embarrassed I was there was nothing I could do but sit there sheepfully. Strangely, no one (not even my brother sitting next to me) seemed to notice me.
As I contemplated my unclothed state and strategy for escape, I heard a loud guttural moan. It came from a mentally challenged very dark-skinned black girl. She appeared to be in her late teens but was dressed like a little girl. Her hair was in two short pigtails and she wore white frilly Easter Sunday dress. She was making a lot of noise so the old lady asked for someone to bring her up front. Two older men in black suits practically dragged her to the altar. The old woman helped the girl to her feet, offering her a gentle smile. She placed on one bony hand upon the girl's shoulder and other was raised in the air. Suddenly there was a howl echoing throughout the chapel, like the sound of a tornado or hurricane. No one seemed at alarmed by the sound. All at once, strange shapes began to appear and they swirled around the girl. They started taking demonic forms, like something from medieval pictures of Hell. One by one, old lady conjured more floating constantly changing demons which tore at the frightened girl with airy claws. Meanwhile the old crone berated the girl for misbehaving; she was using nightmarish illusions in order to frighten her into behaving thus being a good Catholic.
So I made my over to my brother. Apparently he got dragged to mass by a friend before they took their trip out of town. Before I could say anything, the organ started playing signaling the start of mass. As much as I did not want to stay, I didn't want to be rude and just leave abruptly so I sat down. I noticed that instead of a pastor, there was an old Creole lady at the altar. In a clear and resonating voice, she began making a long speech about how to be "good Catholic". I had long since been disillusioned by Catholicism and cut my ties with the church so needless to say I was very uncomfortable and really wanted to leave. However as this speech continued, my clothes started disappearing until I had nothing on but my underwear. Despite how embarrassed I was there was nothing I could do but sit there sheepfully. Strangely, no one (not even my brother sitting next to me) seemed to notice me.
As I contemplated my unclothed state and strategy for escape, I heard a loud guttural moan. It came from a mentally challenged very dark-skinned black girl. She appeared to be in her late teens but was dressed like a little girl. Her hair was in two short pigtails and she wore white frilly Easter Sunday dress. She was making a lot of noise so the old lady asked for someone to bring her up front. Two older men in black suits practically dragged her to the altar. The old woman helped the girl to her feet, offering her a gentle smile. She placed on one bony hand upon the girl's shoulder and other was raised in the air. Suddenly there was a howl echoing throughout the chapel, like the sound of a tornado or hurricane. No one seemed at alarmed by the sound. All at once, strange shapes began to appear and they swirled around the girl. They started taking demonic forms, like something from medieval pictures of Hell. One by one, old lady conjured more floating constantly changing demons which tore at the frightened girl with airy claws. Meanwhile the old crone berated the girl for misbehaving; she was using nightmarish illusions in order to frighten her into behaving thus being a good Catholic.
Entry 1 : (First Dream of 2011) In the Grip of Guilt, Beguiled to Sin by Cuteness
I was taking a gingerly stroll thru my old neighborhood when I stopped in front of my old apartment. As I was reminiscing I came upon a strange creature sitting on the steps. It appeared simply a completely white ball of fluff but on further investigation the creature turned out to be an adorable hybird rabbit, cat and dog. Its face was mostly feline though it had the jowls of a dog with long dropping ears like a rabbit or basset hound. It had the front legs of a dog but back legs of a rabbit which were all almost unseen under its fluff. It walked about like a dog yet occassionally it would hop about in small little burst.
This little creature was the epitome of all things adorable; I simply couldn't take my eyes of it. I had to pet it! I lowered my hand slowly so it could sniff my fingers thus indentifying me as not a threat. After a few sniffs, this creature nudged its head against my hand. The sensation gave me chills; its fur was the softest thing in all creature, almost feather like. Feeling more bold, I picked it up and held in my arms. It gently laid his head against my chest. That action did, I had to keep this animal. It didn't have a collar or tag so I assumed it didn't belong to anyone. I noticed I was under scrutiny by the watchful eyes of the neighbors, old black woman renowned for the nosiness. Nonchalantly I walked away slowly and once I was out of sight of the neighbors, I took off running.
Somehow I managed to arrive at my uncle's house. I showed him the creature and without saying a word offered me a leash for it. After playing with it in the background, my uncle announced that he was heading over to my grandmother's house for she was throwing a get-together. I hopped in his van with the creature asleep in my lap. On the ride, I pondered my course of actions; my gradmother had a fierce no animal in the house rule after her last pet, Precious the poodle was put to sleep. She would never permit to bring this animal into the house despite how adorable it was.
Once we arrived, I moreorless stayed with the animal in the backyard, letting it hop about with the leash. Everyone inside was wondering why I remained outside. As I watch the creature hop to and fro, I was suddenly overwhelmed with guilt. This creature had to have belonged to someone and it must have been missed. Moreover I stole something; I never stole anything of this magnitude before. There was only one thing to do - I had to return it. But how? I couldn't ride the bus with it. I couldn't ask one of my family members for a ride for they would want to know why and I'd have to disclose my secret.
For some reason, a classmate of mine from high school was in attendance. I explained the situation and practically begged her for a ride to old apartment so I could return the favor. At first she gave a lame excuse that she didn't want animals in her car. However after much pleading and a glimpse of the creature, she caved in. I placed the creature in a backpack, hopped in the passenger seat and we both made our way to my old apartment.
* as is almost always the case, I awoke before I knew the outcome of the dream. I can only assume that I made to the apartment and let the creature go.
This little creature was the epitome of all things adorable; I simply couldn't take my eyes of it. I had to pet it! I lowered my hand slowly so it could sniff my fingers thus indentifying me as not a threat. After a few sniffs, this creature nudged its head against my hand. The sensation gave me chills; its fur was the softest thing in all creature, almost feather like. Feeling more bold, I picked it up and held in my arms. It gently laid his head against my chest. That action did, I had to keep this animal. It didn't have a collar or tag so I assumed it didn't belong to anyone. I noticed I was under scrutiny by the watchful eyes of the neighbors, old black woman renowned for the nosiness. Nonchalantly I walked away slowly and once I was out of sight of the neighbors, I took off running.
Somehow I managed to arrive at my uncle's house. I showed him the creature and without saying a word offered me a leash for it. After playing with it in the background, my uncle announced that he was heading over to my grandmother's house for she was throwing a get-together. I hopped in his van with the creature asleep in my lap. On the ride, I pondered my course of actions; my gradmother had a fierce no animal in the house rule after her last pet, Precious the poodle was put to sleep. She would never permit to bring this animal into the house despite how adorable it was.
Once we arrived, I moreorless stayed with the animal in the backyard, letting it hop about with the leash. Everyone inside was wondering why I remained outside. As I watch the creature hop to and fro, I was suddenly overwhelmed with guilt. This creature had to have belonged to someone and it must have been missed. Moreover I stole something; I never stole anything of this magnitude before. There was only one thing to do - I had to return it. But how? I couldn't ride the bus with it. I couldn't ask one of my family members for a ride for they would want to know why and I'd have to disclose my secret.
For some reason, a classmate of mine from high school was in attendance. I explained the situation and practically begged her for a ride to old apartment so I could return the favor. At first she gave a lame excuse that she didn't want animals in her car. However after much pleading and a glimpse of the creature, she caved in. I placed the creature in a backpack, hopped in the passenger seat and we both made our way to my old apartment.
* as is almost always the case, I awoke before I knew the outcome of the dream. I can only assume that I made to the apartment and let the creature go.
Welcome
This blog is dedicated to documenting the series of bizarre and surreal dreams that I am subject to. Normally I can interpret dreams, whether they be my own or others. However, especially these past couple of years, I receive dreams that are beyond interpreting and if in the off chance I actually remember them, I have to jot them down just for the sake of amusement. Thus this blog was created just for that purpose.
As for the title... Oneiroi?
The Oneiroi were the gods of dreams in Greek mythology. The most famous of these deities was Morpheus; in antiquity he was the god of dreams that dealt with various interactions with people. Morpheus had two lesser known brothers; one was Icelus or Phobetor, the god of nightmares (or succintly dreams conjuring images of scary beasts) and the other Phantasmos, the god of fantasies (mainly where inanimate objects came to life)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oneiroi
Because the dreams chronicled in this dream are not your run of the mill ordinary dreams but rather are more surreal and unexplainable, I thought it apropos to dedicate this blog to those black-winged deities of nocturnal whimsy.
As for the title... Oneiroi?
The Oneiroi were the gods of dreams in Greek mythology. The most famous of these deities was Morpheus; in antiquity he was the god of dreams that dealt with various interactions with people. Morpheus had two lesser known brothers; one was Icelus or Phobetor, the god of nightmares (or succintly dreams conjuring images of scary beasts) and the other Phantasmos, the god of fantasies (mainly where inanimate objects came to life)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oneiroi
Because the dreams chronicled in this dream are not your run of the mill ordinary dreams but rather are more surreal and unexplainable, I thought it apropos to dedicate this blog to those black-winged deities of nocturnal whimsy.
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